My Nobody
by PizzaAngel99
Summary: "They told me that to make her fall in love, I had to make her laugh. But every time she laughs, I'm the one who falls in love." My take on Joker and Harley's first meeting, and everything beyond. (Suicide Squad) "Anything you say can and will be held agaisnt you. So only say my name."
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note:** This is my take on Harley and the Jokers first meeting.

I should be writing my other fanfiction that I'm two weeks late on but this wouldn't leave me alone until I finished it. So blame this for my lateness. Hope you enjoy!

* * *

Dr. Harleen Quinzel wasn't one for danger. Never had been. But something about this job had caught her eye. Or... Someone. They called him the Joker. A crime lord. Gangster. Mob boss. The story changed, but the man remained. And she aimed to find out everything about him.

Her heels clicked on the concrete floor as she walked down the halls of Arkham Asylum. She knew the way, she had walked it many times before. But today... Today was the first day she was going to be face to face with him. A one on one interview with the Joker. She was almost giddy with excitement.

She fingered her keycard absently as she reached the final door, the guard checking her ID before letting her through. She had never been past this point before, so she let herself have a moment to take it in.

Rows and rows of closed cells lined the walls. But they were made tougher than the hundreds she had passed before. These were built to keep people out just as much as in.

The florescent lights hanging from the ceiling made her squint as she resumed her walking. Keeping a good distance from the cell walls. Who knew what horrible people were kept down here with him. Hmm... That was good. She thought to herself as she pulled her notepad and pencil from her lab coat and wrote that down.

It seemed inspiration struck her everywhere when it concerned him. Her book was going to shed light on the horrible misfortune of people like the Joker. She had been working on it for months at this point, and yet this was the first time she was ever going to speak to him face to face.

She had been alloud, in previous sessions, to watch him through the live security feeds, but she had needed face to face contact. And after several weeks of paperwork, and passing several tests on the way in here, she was finally going to get her interview.

"Right this way ma'am." One of the guards said as he led her down one of the halls. Harley inclined her head and smiled a little. She was so close. She couldn't wait.

* * *

Joker wasn't one to appreciate a structured day, but he did come to expect a certain order of things here at Arkham. He would be fed in the morning. He would get a chance to talk to a few of the guards as they took him to the common area. He would mingle mildly. And then he would be taken back to his cell. And it would repeat. That was normal. That was expected. And order within chaos kept him sane. Well... Sane enough.

So when the guards didn't take him to the common area, and instead to a small concrete room. He was curious. When they left him there and locked the door. He had expected an appearance by that stupid Bat-Freak that had recently become a pain in his side. But after hours passed, he honestly couldn't figure out why he was here.

He had combed every inch of the room with a trained eye, but had come up with nothing. Eventually sitting down in one of the metal chairs fastened to the floor. And would have placed his hands on the table, probably also fastened to the floor, were they not wrapped around his torso in a straight jacket. And waited. And waited. Until finally a buzz from the door pulled him from his thoughts.

The door unlocked, which was the cause of the buzz, and opened. And in stepped a girl. Well, a woman. Huh.

She stared at him with what he could only describe as a mix of wonder and awe as she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose and took a step closer to him.

"Mr. Joker? Or do you prefer just Joker?" were the first words from her beautifully lush lips. Oh this would be too easy. Joker decided as he smirked and leaned back a little.

"Either." Joker said simply. Putting on an act not unlike one he used on a day to day basis. "And what might I call you?" he asked as she sat down across the table from him and pulled out a note-pad and a pencil.

"Harleen Quinzel. Dr. Harleen Quinzel." she told him as she looked back up and met his eyes. Joker's smile was real now. A psychiatrist? Those were even more fun.

"Harley Quinn then." he said offhandedly, not even bothering to see if she liked the new nickname he had given her. "I assume you're here to-" but he didn't get to finish as he was interrupted.

"That's not fair. If I get a nickname, then you need one too." She was saying. "I'm sorry what?" Joker asked as he raised an eyebrow. That was... Unexpected.

She nodded, a strand of her blonde hair falling from it's structured bun on the back of her head. "Yeah. Like..." she smiled. And Joker's heart fluttered. "Mr. J."

This was getting out of hand fast, Joker realized. His smile fading. "That's a stupid nickname." he said sharply. Trying not to let his frustration with this situation show.

Harley shrugged and looked back at her note-pad. "I think it suits you."

Joker wasn't sure what to say to that. So he didn't say anything. Luckily, she talked before the silence reached awkward territory. "So, Mr. Joker, tell me about your childhood."

The smile returned and Joker leaned forward again. He could salvage this. He had several tragic backstories ready to use.

But before he could answer, she stopped him. "Wait, never mind. You have hundreds of those stories. It'll be fake."

Joker raised an eyebrow, his mouth falling open a little. This was not how he had expected this to go. "So you've done research on me." he finally said. And she nodded. A smile on her face. "Of course. You're kinda the biggest story of my career."

She was starting to sound like a reporter. And Joker hated those. "How do you figure?" he asked her. His tongue licking his teeth in an effort to unerve the poor girl. But she didn't seem detered at all.

"You're insane." She said as she looked up at him. Pushing her glasses up her nose a little farther. "And I want to find out why."

Joker didn't say anything for a few moments. Trying to figure this girl out was more difficult than it should be. "I'm not insane." he told her just before his silence got awkward.

She blinked at him a few times, and Joker was finding it harder to look away from her eyes. They were so blue...

"Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results." She told him, a small smile tugging at her lips. "And how many times have you tried to take over Gotham?"

She spoke to him with such authority. Boldly saying what was on her mind and seemingly not caring that the man she was talking to could kill her in an instant. Well, he couldn't kill her right now, and so far he wouldn't have wanted to. But her boldness impressed him. And did something else to him he would rather not think about right now.

He grinned at her. Actually grinned. A chuckle escaping his chapped lips as he titled his head. "I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."

She was looking at him again. And Joker could see something shift in her eyes. She may be useful yet.

"I've always thought insanity is relative. It depends on who has who locked in what cage." She said as she looked down, writing something in her notebook.

"Do you think I'm insane?" He asked her after a few moments. Genuinely curious as to her answer.

She seemed to think about it for a moment before shaking her head. "No. I don't." She looked up at him and their eyes met. "Do you?"

Did he? What an odd question. He certainly acted insane. But was he really? After all, what was insanity? Who was the judge of it?

* * *

Harleen watched him. Could almost see the the thoughts running through his head. His answer would be very telling she was sure. However she would never get her answer.

The door buzzed and unlocked. A guard walking in.

"Times up ma'am." He told her as he took a small step into the room. His hand near his gun as a precaution against the Joker. Not that he needed it. He was in a straight jacket for crying out loud. Speaking of, she should talk to someone about getting him out if it.

"And so it is." Harleen said as she stood. Pushing her pencil behind her ear and putting the notepad back into her pocket.

Her eyes lingered on the Joker as the guard escorted her toward the door. He was still looking at her. Looking somewhere between disappointed an relieved. "I'll see you next week Mr. Joker." she told him before she stepped outside.

"I'll look forward to it." He said. His voice deeper and more menacing. She could her his laughter echoing down the halls as she walked them.

* * *

Joker was taken back to his cell then. Roughly shoved into a room that amounted to no more than a bed. His straight jacket remained on his body though. A new addition to his nightly routine since he had escaped last time.

Sitting down on the bed, he recalled the women. He could still smell her perfume. Lavander? And he couldn't get her out of his head. Her eyes. Her smile. Her lips...

"Stop it." He told himself. Shaking his head as he sat down on the bed. She was nothing. She meant nothing. She was nobody. She would never be anybody. And especially not to him.

* * *

 _"Do you think you're insane?" "Do you want me to be?" "Yes."_

* * *

 **Authors note:** This is intended to be a one-shot, but I might continue the story if the inspiration strikes, or enough of you want it. Hope you enjoyed!


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors note:** This hasn't gotten a huge response, but I wrote this short chapter up. Just something to pass the time until to movie comes out. It's based almost entirely on my speculation as to how the characters will be portrayed.

* * *

Joker laughed as he spit blood from his mouth. Grinning up at the giant man dressed as a bat. Batman, the papers called him. The man growled and punched him again. The Joker could feel his skull rattling at the pressure, but he just kept laughing.

The Batman dropped him to the ground, the mud of the alleyway splashing onto his pants. And still the Joker was laughing. "You really know how to show a guy a nice time Batsy." He said as he grinned up at the man. Earning himself another punch to the face.

This... Batman, had only recently become the Joker's newest play toy. As far as he knew, the Batman had just shown up not very long ago. And he was making it hell for the criminals of Gotham. But not for the Joker.

Sure, he ruined every single one of his plans. And seemed to enjoy punching people more than talking. But hey, no one was perfect.

Batman grabbed his arm, holding it tighter than was necessary, and dragged him off the ground and toward the street. The Joker's laugh had faded into a chuckle. Back to jail then. Oh well. Maybe Harley would be there.

Harley... Where had that thought come from? Sure they had had a few more sessions, or meetings, or whatever they wanted to call them. But they were hardly close. Or friends. Or anything that should make him excited to see her again.

Joker grimaced as he was shoved against the wall. He was going to be bruised later he could just tell. The Batman left him there, and Joker could hear sirens in the distance.

He looked up at the sky, the rain hitting his face uncomfortably as he tried to spot the stars past the lights of the city. Having no luck.

He wondered what Harley was doing right now... Probably asleep. Or preparing to be. He lifted his head and let it fall against the concrete wall as he frowned. What a stupid thing to wonder. He scolded himself. He had a reputation to maintain.

The sirins came closer but Joker didn't even bother to laugh. He didn't have a back up plan this time. It was over. He was beaten. It was back to Arkham with him.

* * *

Harleen walked down the hallways a little faster today. Almost tripping a few times due to her heels. It was all over the news, what had happened to her Joker.

She paused. Freezing mid-step. Her Joker? Since when had she been referring to him as that?

What had happened to the Joker. And she would be lying if she said she wasn't worried about him. That Batman character was no good. So far he was only making things worse. And not just for the Joker. But for all the patients here.

They felt challenged by him. And they rose to that challenge in terrifying ways.

She swipped her new keycard and stepped through the door into the high security part of Arkham. Harleen had been granted a full time job here as acting psychiatrist. The last one had been driven insane and was newly admitted here yestersay. He was actually her next patient after the Joker she remembered as she walked through the doors and down the hall. Ignoring the obnoxious whistles she was getting from the male prisoners. And some of the women too.

She reached the room a few moments later, one of the guards letting her in. She had yet to receive proper clearance into here. But that would change in a few days after the papers went through.

The room was empty save for the table and two chairs that were always there. Harleen made a mental note to perhaps bring something to brighten the place up. It was, technically speaking, her office.

She pulled the chair back from the table and sat down, pulling out her notebook and reading through some of her notes.

* * *

The Joker groaned lightly as he was led to the room he that had become his 'cell away from his cell.' He didn't want to talk to anyone right now. Least of all Harley. His face was bruised, and he was just dead tired. He didn't have the enegery to interact with anyone.

Harley was already there when he arrived which was new. But honestly he could care less. He just wanted this over with so he could sleep.

He sighed as he sat down. The guards leaving them alone in the room.

The girl was reading from her notebook, so she didn't look up right away. But again, the Joker could care less. As much as he cared she could never speak again and it would be no loss to him.

Well, he would eventually miss it. His more rational side said. But his rational side was quieter today than it usually was.

When Harley finally looked up at him, he could tell she was startled. Good. People should be when they see me. He told himself. But a pang of remorse shot through him unexpectedly.

"You look aweful." Were the first words from her mouth.

"Oh yeah? Well you look worse." He shot back without really thinking about it. The insult was so juvenile even he had to cringe. But Harley, Harley laughed.

It struck him that he hadn't heard her laugh before. He rather liked it.

She continued to laugh for a few moments as she wiped under her eye. "I'm sorry." She apologized, smiling at him. "I'm sorry. That was just so..."

"Juvenile." The Joker supplied the word for her.

Harley nodded and smiled at him. "Yeah."

* * *

Harleen smiled at the Joker. Surprised when he smiled back genuinely. But her smile faded as she got to work, opening her notebook to the page she had left on.

"I won't keep you long. You look like you could use some sleep." She spoke as she looked back up at him. "Maybe we can talk about the Batman."

She watched him closely for his reaction, normally he would smile. Or crack a joke. But he simply stared at her.

Harleen titled her head a little and wrote that down before looking back up at him. "Mr Joker?" She asked to hopefully prompt him.

"Batman," He said, as if testing the words on his lips. "Is a thorn."

"A thorn?" Harleen asked as she absently wrote that down as well. After a few minutes, it was clear he wasn't going to elaborate, so Harleen decided to ask him about something else. Something she hadn't yet in their multiple sessions.

"Lets talk about your tattoos."

The Joker scoffed. Giving her a look. "Now you sound like a psychiatrist."

"I am one." Harleen reminded him.

But he shook his head, looking at her as if he could see right through her. "No... There's something in your eyes." He leaned forward across the table.

"Now who sounds like a psychiatrist?" Harleen said, trying to defuse the tension.

The Joker smiled, titling his head as he leaned back again. "You have a sharp wit Harley. Don't loose that."

Harleen looked up at him, meeting his eyes this time. He smiled, leaning forward again. "There's a fine line between genius and insanity. And I've erased the line."

Harleen stared at him for longer than she would like to admit before she stood. "I'll let you get some rest. And I'll see you next week." She didn't look at him again as she left.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors note:** Wow! Overwhelmed by the sudden flow of follows favs and reviews! Loved every single one of them. This chapter is extra long, so strap yourselves in. It was frustratingly hard to write, but with some help from my sister I think I'm satisfied with how it turned out. You be the judge. But be gentle with me. XD A new chapter might be up soon, haven't decided. I was trying to finish this before I see the movie, but that doesn't look likely. We'll see I suppose. Anyway, enough from me, enjoy!

* * *

Harleen found herself staring at him. The Joker. He was pacing back and forth across the room. A few times he stopped, seemed to have an internal argument with himself, then started to pace again. This had been going on for almost half an hour. And it was starting to tire her out.

This session had been going much more difficultly than the last one. He seemed to go through moods, she decided. A symptom a normal person would associate with insanity. Or at the very least a bipolar disorder. But Harleen knew better. Joker wasn't insane, as much as the signs pointed to that. No. It was deeper than something so simple.

She cleared her throat, hoping to pull him back into focus. And when he didn't respond, she cleared it again. Still nothing. She had just about resigned herself to not getting anything out of this meeting until he suddenly spoke.

"Do you want children?"

Harleen blinked a few times. Of all the questions he could have asked, that was one she was not expecting. "I, uh, I mean, maybe someday." she answered.

He seemed to be looking at her like he was going to say more, but he didn't. Resuming his pacing again.

"Do you?" She asked as she watched him. It seemed like the natural follow up question.

He stopped, but didn't look at her. "I might have."

Harleen leaned forward a little. "Did you have a family?" she pressed gently. This information would be something he had never told anyone. And Harleen was itching to uncover it.

He resumed his pacing, his eye twitching a little.

Harley sighed, knowing him well enough to know that this wasn't going to go anywhere. She yawned a little, raising her hand to her mouth, her sleeve falling toward her elbow. She just wasn't prepared for a full session with him honestly. She was tired. She just wanted to go home and sleep away her troubles.

And maybe he did too. He sat back down across from her, seemingly in a slight daze, but Harleen could see him thinking. About what, she might never know.

* * *

This was their what? Sixteenth, seventeenth session? It didn't matter. But Joker could tell Harley's heart wasn't in this one. She always seemed so... Animated? Feisty? Happy perhapes was the right word. But today she was the opposite. He dared say she was... Sad.

And he had tried, but he couldn't ignore the bruises on her arms.

She asked him standard questions early on. How are you feeling? How do you feel about Arkham? How do you feel about yourself? Blah, blah, blah. And had received no answers from him. His heart wasn't in it, and neither was hers. He was busy plotting. Or he was trying to be.

He was mostly trying to ignore the burning desire he had to ask her what was wrong.

He failed.

"Harley..." He started, and her head snapped up to look at him. He shifted a bit awkwardly in his seat. "Are you... Alright?"

She looked at him with surprise, immediatly shaking her head. "Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?"

Stop talking. Stop talking. He scolded himself, but his mouth apparently didn't get the memo. "You just look so sad."

She smiled at him, but it was a sad smile. It made his heart ache in a weird way. "I'm alright. But thank you for your concern. Just some personal issues."

Joker knew he should stop. He needed to stop. But he was overtaken by a sudden desire to see her smile again.

"Knock knock." He said as he leaned forward across the table.

She smiled, and he could tell she was humoring him as she also leaned across the table. "Who's there?"

"Marry." He said. Suddnely realising she was inches from his face. He had never seen her this close, and somehow she was even more beautiful. The joke he was telling was stupid. Beyond stupid actually. But maybe so was he in this moment.

"Marry who?" She asked, her voice softer as she leaned a little closer.

"Marry me." he said as he closed the distance between the two of them. Their lips colliding softly.

* * *

Joker had organized the mother of all breakouts. And the plan was proceeding flawlessly. He wanted to laugh, but knew it would only put the guards on high alert. And he didn't want that... Yet.

He was feeling particularly psychotic today. His more rational side drowned out by the restlessness of being stuck here for much longer than was acceptable.

He was marched down the hall past some other patients of note. Pamela Isley. Jonathon Crane. Victor Freeze. But he payed them no more mind than he would any other day.

One of the guards pushed him forward just a bit too harshly, and the Joker almost lost his footing. Shooting a glare at the man who had pushed him.

They were taking him back to his cell. Well, at least they thought they were. The Joker had other plans for them. And those plans involved one Harley Quinn. She had no knowledge of the plan of course. But she would be instrumental in its execution.

His eyes raised to one of the guards on the second level. He winked at one of them. Barely noticeable, but it was enough.

One of the guards walking him stopped and grabbed his shoulder, pulling him back. "What was that, clown?" he asked, pushing the Joker against the wall.

Joker shrugged as much as the straight jacket would allow, grinning madly now. The guard glared and shoved him a bit harder, and Joker really exaggerated his fall into the wall. Knowing that any second now-

"What is this!?"

Ah. There she was. Joker continued his act of pain, but couldn't help the small smile that spread as he saw her. His Harley Quinn.

She was above them on the walkway, her hands on her hips as she glared down at the guards. "What do you think you're doing? We've talked about how we treat the prisoners."

"But ma'am-" The guard started. But Harley cut him off. "Take him to the room if you're worried he'll attempt something." She told them firmly. "No arguing. We don't want anything jeopardizing our work here."

The Joker smiled as the guards pushed him out of sight, leading him toward the cell he spent all his sessions with Miss. Harley Quinn. Everything was going according to plan.

His plan was, of course, to create chaos. He had managed to coerce several guards to his side. And he had a fairly loyal gang outside of this stone prison. And they were all ready. The guards on his side would pulled every alarm they could, setting the prisoners free, and the other inmates here would create enough pandemonium that no one would even notice his escape until much later.

His goons would meet him, and go with him to safety. He might need cannon fodder as well. One could never know.

It had been several months since he had been outside of Arkham. And almost as long ago since he had met Harley.

Speaking of, he looked around the room as he was shoved inside. There was a bookshelf in the corner now. A few pictures on the wall. And a filing cabinet next to the table. She had really started to personalize the place.

He moved the chair back with his foot so he could sit down, and waited for her to arrive.

* * *

Harleen took a sip of her coffee, simultaneously pushing her glasses up her nose as she read over her schedule for today. She could make room for a quick talk with the Joker she decided as she turned down another hallway.

"Ma'am! Wait!"

Harleen stopped and turned around as one of the guards ran up to her, holding out a manila folder for her to take.

"This came in for you a few moments ago."

Harleen took it with a frown. Starting to open it before the guard stopped her. "Ma'am, maybe you should wait to open it." He said.

Harleen raised an eyebrow. "What are you saying?"

The guard bit his lip and turned the folder over in her hand. "Love Mr. J." was written in what looked like, and what she hoped was, red crayon. Love Mr. J...

"We tested it for anything dangerous and couldn't find anything. But maybe you should ask him about it first." The guard was saying. But Harleen wasn't really paying attention.

* * *

 _"Marry who?"_

 _"Marry me."_

 _Their lips collided softly, and Harleen found herself unable to breathe. He was so soft. So gentle. So unlike the other men in her life. But she came back to her senses quickly, pulling away and slapping his face. She was against violence, but a girl had a right to defend herself._

 _For a long time they just stared at each other. Neither knowing what to say. So they didn't say anything, and Harleen left. They never spoke of it again._

* * *

"Ma'am?" The guard asked, pulling her out of her thoughts. Harleen startled a little, but put the folder under her arm and nodded. "That's fine. Thank you."

The guard looked at her strangely for a few moments before walking away. Muttering something under her breath. Harleen watched him go before resuming her walk. That kiss had been the greatest mistake of her life. And she had made great efforts to make sure he knew that it was a one time mistake. That she wasn't that kind of girl. That he hadn't gotten under her skin.

But maybe she was that kind of girl. And he had definitely gotten under her skin. And by the looks of it, he knew that. And that was terrifying.

It wasn't long before she reached the room. She didn't even need a guard to buzz her in now as she swipped her keycard and opened the door. Finding the Joker already inside.

She moved over to the table, pushing the chair back with her foot so she could sit down. She set her coffee on the table. Then her notepad. And finally the folder. The Joker watched her with rapt attention.

"What's this?" she asked him as she placed her hand over the folder.

His eye twitched. Something she knew was a tell-tale sign of him lying to her. "I have no idea."

"Don't lie to me." She said firmly. Staring him down across the table. The Joker stared right back, leaning across the table so his head was more than halfway across it. "I would never lie to you."

Harleen smiled. But it was a sarcastic smile. "Hmm. Of course you wouldn't."

"Cross my heart." he said. And by the small shoulder movement he did, Harleen could guess he would be doing the gesture had his hands not been stuck in a straight jacket.

This was absolutely no good at all. She was a professional. She was better than this. Better than him. He didn't get to manipulate her.

Harleen looked at him for awhile before sighing. She was going to have to open the folder eventually. She maintained her slightly angry demeanor as she picked it up. She could feel his eyes on her as she dumped its contents onto the table. It landed with a clunk.

"A phone?" she questioned as she picked it up. "How did you get your hands on-"

But she never got a chance to finish her sentence as alarms and sirens started to blare.

Now what?

She stood up as some guards ran into the room. "What's going-" But she didn't get a chance to finish that sentence either as one of them grabbed her head, and slammed it against the table.

Everything was a bit fuzzy after that. She heard yelled, saw the Joker, but nothing stayed in focus for very long and eventually it faded into black.

* * *

It took eveything in him to not yell at the guard who had slammed her head into a perfectly innocent metal table. But he restrained himself. This was part of the plan reminded himself.

One of the guards rounded the table and began to undo the straps on the straight jacket. Joker grimaced as he pulled it off. His arms were beyond asleep. They practically felt nonexistent. He moved them slowly. Trying to return blood flow to them.

As he was doing this, the Joker was led by the guards through the halls. One of them dragged an unconscious Harleen Quinzel with them. Had he been alone. and his arms were working properly, he might have carried her himself. But that was besides the point.

Before he left, he grabbed the phone from the table. Putting it in the waistband of his sweatpants.

He was led toward the hospital wing of Arkham, where some of his favorite gang memebers were waiting.

Having disposed of all the doctors, and been the cause of the alarms. It was the perfect getaway.

All the cells had been opened. The guards not loyal to him, as well as the Batman if he decided to show up, would be too busy with the others to worry about him. It was perfect. Sadly, it would only work once. So he would have to savor this moment.

Harley moaned, and Joker spared her a glance. Not because he cared, he reminded himself. But because he... Because... Because he needed her to be okay.

"Boss, what do we do with her?" One of the thugs asked.

"Leave her with me. The rest of you go wreak havoc. And make sure to laugh." he started his sentence serious, then added his own laugh at the end. Although he wasn't feeling it at the moment.

Harley groaned again, and Joker felt a stab of guilt. This was going to get worse for her before it got better. And he regretted that deeply.

His arms had finally gotten feeling returned to them, and a grin spread across his face as he stretched them over his head. That felt so good.

He realized the guards was still there and glared at them. "Get out of here." he snapped. And they hurried away.

When he was certain he was alone, Joker knelt next to Harley, brushing some of her hair from her face as he slipped the phone into her white lab coat pocket.

"I think this madness started the moment we met. Did you have a disease or something?" He asked her. Though he knew she couldn't hear him. Much less answer.

He picked her up slowly, his arms were still quite sore, before putting her down on one of the medical beds in the room. He studied her face, trying to determine when she would wake up. It wouldn't be long. Her eyelids were already starting to flutter open.

Her eyes... So beautiful. Such a beautiful blue. Like the sky.

Stop it. He mentally scolded himself for the hundredth time. Why should he care about this girl? She was nothing.

But she's different from the others. His more rational side reminded him. She's special.

She's nothing. She's nobody.

So are we.

* * *

 _"I love you. I hate you. I like you. I hate you. I love you. I think you're stupid. I think you're a loser. I think you're wonderful. I want to be with you. I don't want to be with you. I would never date you. I hate you. I love you…..I think the madness started the moment we met and you shook my hand. Did you have a disease or something?" -Shannon L. Alder_


	4. Chapter 4

**Authors Note:** There's so many of you reading this! It's so exciting and also intimidating. I'm glad you're all enjoying it so far! And I hope you continue to like it for however long it continues. I'm thinking of continuing it up to, and a little bit past, the movie. Though it will be somewhat AU from the movie. Speaking of, I got to see the movie opening weekend and loved it. It was somewhat of a mess plot wise, but it was just so much fun. And Joker and Harley were perfect. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

Harleen woke up slowly, blinking in the harsh light. What had happened? Joker... The alarms... Her head... She tried to raise her hand, finding that it was bound to the table she was laying on. Both her hands were, as well as her legs. She looked around with wide and terrifed eyes. "Hello?" She called out.

She turned her head the other way, taking in the room. It looked like the medical wing. Why would she be here? "Hello!?"

Suddenly the Joker was there, standing over her with something in his hands. She couldn't make out what in the light.

Harleen suddenly felt terrified. She had never felt that way with him before. Maybe she should have, in hindsight. But she never had. He was always just so... Sad. Now he just seemed... Angry.

"You gonna kill me Mistah J?" She asked, a half laugh half sob escaping her lips.

"Oh... I'm not gonna kill ya. I'm just gonna hurt ya. Really, really, bad."

* * *

Harleen had all but lost her job when the Joker had broken out. If not for what he did to her, she would probably have been implicated in his breakout. She should be thanking him. Or at least that's what she told herself when she woke up from her nightmares.

She didn't remember much of what he had done. Which was probably for the best. But she remembered it hurt. And she had a bruise under her eye to show for it.

She yawned and pushed her glasses up her nose as she attempted to sort her notes into somthing readable. She was sitting on the floor of her apartment. Hundreds of papers surrounding her.

Her apartment wasn't grand, in fact it was pretty small, but it was home. And it was enough. She sighed as she stood. She needed to get out of the house. She needed to get her mind off of her job. And off of him.

Maybe she was crazy, maybe he was insane. She honestly didn't know any more.

She picked up the phone that she had found in her pocket. The one the Joker had given her. She had kept it for herself, not seeing the harm. She still couldn't figure out why he had given it to her. It had served no purpose. Turning it over, she caught a glimpse of something she hadn't seen before. Stuck in the case and covering the camera, was what looked like a piece of paper.

Harleen pulled the case off and turned the paper over. On the back of it was an address, signed with a J.

Frowning, she sat down at her computer and typed in the address. It pulled up a street view of a club. The King of Hearts, it was called. Why on Earth would he have-

She cut herself off. It didn't matter. Maybe she would go to the club. She needed a distraction. And, if she was being completely honest with herself, she really missed him.

But she wouldn't go alone, she told herself, picking up her gun from the table. She had stolen it from her last boyfriend. And it has served her well on late night walks home. She had never fired it, but it usually scared most people off. Speaking of her boyfriend, she pulled her sleeve down her arm further. Hiding the hideous bruises that covered it.

She stuffed the gun into her jeans and covered it with her shirt as she started toward the door. Phone in hand.

* * *

A cheer went up from the crowd, but Joker barely acknowledged it. He moved into the beaded off section of his club, sitting down on the white leather couch. His personal guards flanked either side of it, and a waiter brought him a drink.

This was his club. His turf. No one came here that he didn't want to. Not the police. Not the Batman. Well, maybe the Batman would eventually. But Joker had it on good authority that he was busy with some small time crooks. No surprises tonight.

He took a sip of his drink, he honestly wasn't sure what it was, and looked out across the crowd. Some of the entertainers caught his eye, but not for very long. If tonight was a night for honesty, then he would admit to being bored out of his mind.

"Boss." One of his other guards parted the beads and stepped through. He was one of Jokers favorites. What was his name? Bart? Barry? It didn't matter. "Someone's here to see you. She won't leave."

Joker put down his drink, turning to look through the crowd and toward the entrance. No. It couldn't be. But it was. It was Harley.

Why wasn't he rid of her? He should be rid of her. He should never have to see her again. And yet here she was. In his club. Apparently looking for him. Well, to be fair, he had left the address on the phone he had given her. But never in a million years did he think she would actually come.

Joker stood, weaving his way through the crowd toward her. She was being manhandled by some of his guards that were trying to keep her from entering the club fully. But he could see she was fighting them in her own way. Trying to pull her arms free.

It didn't take him long to reach them, and when he did, they all seemed to freeze at the sight of him.

He waved his hand, indicating the guards should leave. Which they did. Leaving him and Harley alone. She looked different now that she wasn't in her doctors uniform. Black pants and a blue shirt, her hair down around her neck. But she was no less... beautiful.

He needed to be rid of her. He had gotten attached to her. He cared. And he wasn't supposed to do that. It was dangerous.

In one swift movement, he grabbed onto her arm and pulled her with him toward the door. He pulled his keys out of his silver jacket pocket, spinning them on his finger as he led her out toward his purple Lamborghini.

He wasn't exactly inconspicuous, what with his hair, skin, tattoos, and his silver suit. And his car was the same. It was purple for crying out loud.

"Let go of me!" Harley was protesting, finally finding her voice it seemed, and struggling under his grip, but Joker only held on tighter. "Let go, ya hear!" She continued to protest. Her accent coming through stronger than usual.

Joker opened the passengers side door, shoving her toward it. "Get in." he said. It was a command. Not a request. And he was mildly pleased that she listened immediatly. Her earlier protests silenced by his tone.

He shut the door and walked around to the other side, getting in. "Where are you taking me?" She asked him, but he ignored her as he started the car.

He pulled out onto the road, ignoring her as he floored the gas pedal. His rational side told him to relax. Let her in. But he didn't let that side win today. Harley needed to go. He couldn't afford to have distractions.

He hadn't driven very far when she seemed to finally have enough of him. Sending him a glare, she opened the door on her side, pushing it open with more strength than he would have imagined she possesed. He pressed down on the gas pedal and the car screeched to a stop.

He watched as she moved in front of the car, hitting the hood with her hand as she pulled out a gun. "Get out of the car!" She yelled at him. And Joker couldn't help but grin. This would be fun.

He opened his door and stepped out, his hands raised a little in surrender. "What now sweetheart?" he asked. Sarcasm lacing his words. "We kiss and make up?" His eyes briefly glanced at her lips. Oh he would love that.

"Where are you taking me?" She asked him. Ignoring his words. "Why did you leave this for me?" She held up the phone with her other hand. The gun still leveled at his forehead.

Jokers smile faded. "It was a gift." He finally said.

"Why?" Was her reply. Why indeed? Why had he given it to her? It served virtually no purpose other than to create a problem for himself. Maybe his subconscious wanted to see her again. Maybe his heart overtook his mind. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

Oh forget it. He scolded himself as he pushed the gun away with his hand. She stared at him as he closed the gap between them, cupping her face with his hands as he pressed his lips to hers. Relishing in the taste of her.

Her hands were in his hair, and he purred softly as he deepened the kiss. When he finally pulled away, her eyes were closed. "You fell for me." She murmured softly.

"I didn't fall for you. You tripped me." He said immediatly. And she laughed. It was such a beautiful sound.

He was disgusted with himself. He had enjoyed every second of that kiss. And he almost felt a stab of pity. But there was no going back. He had her now. He could be rid of her if he wanted. She would follow him to her grave.

He smiled, holding his hand out for the gun. "Get back in the car."

* * *

He took her to the one place he knew best. ACE Chemicals.

It hadn't changed much since he had been here last. It was dirty, but it had always been dirty. It was hot, but it had always been hot. He hated it here, but he had always hated it here.

He led her down the halls toward the balcony. The clang of machinery, and the hiss and pop of steam causing her to jump every few seconds. No matter. She wouldn't be doing anything in a few minutes.

He stopped her on the edge of the balcony. His hand wrapped around her elebow.

"This is where I died. And was reborn." He said as he studied her expression. Trying to judge how far he would need to push her.

"Did it hurt?" She asked softly. Looking down at several vats of chemicals.

"Yes." He replied honestly.

She turned back to him, her hand going toward his shoulder. "I'm sorry."

He smiled. A coy, manipulative, smile. "Would you die for me Harley?" he asked, stepped a bit closer to her. Forcing her to take a step back toward the edge.

"Yes." She replied softly.

"That's too easy." He said as he covered her mouth with his hand. "Would you... Would you live for me?" he asked as he pulled it back.

"Yes." She said again, leaning closer to him.

"Careful." He said as he held up his finger. "Do not say this oath thoughtlessly. Desire becomes surrender, surrender becomes power. You want this?"

"I do." She said, and Joker smiled. He took a small step back, leaving her at the edge. He would either have to push her in, or she would do it herself. Either way. She was out of his life for good.

He watched as she turned her back to him, looking down at the vats of chemicals below.

He watched as she extended her arms out to either side of her.

And he watched as she fell forward.

To her credit, she didn't scream on the way down. And only a faint splash broke the silence. He could leave her there. She couldn't swim. She would drown. He was free.

With those thoughts in mind he started to walk away.

 _"You gonna kill me Mistah J?"_

Joker stopped walking, closing his eyes tightly as he clenched his fists. Just walk away. He told himself. She's more trouble than she's worth. She's not worth it. She's a weakness. She's... The most beautiful girl I've ever known. She's smart, and funny, and I... I love her.

In one swift motion he turned and ripped his jacket off. Throwing it aside, he took a deep breath before he jumped off the balcony after her.

* * *

Harley was going to die.

She screamed, but she just managed to swallow more of... Whatever chemical this was. She had never learned how to swim. He knew that, didn't he? She had told him that.

She felt her back hit the bottom, and she suddenly realized what the Joker had done. He had killed her. He had been lying. He had been lying about it all.

She would have started crying had she been able to.

She had started to spasm as her eyelids grew heavy from the lack of air. What had she been thinking? Was she crazy? Or sane for the first time in her life? It didn't matter now. She was a dead woman either way.

* * *

Joker hit the chemicals head first. His arms extended outward to grab onto Harley. She was much further into the water than he expected, and he felt a stab of panic when he pulled her above the surface and she wasn't breathing.

Her skin was several shades whiter than it had been. As well as her hair. Her clothing had all but dissolved, and he could feel his doing the same. The colors from their shirts surrounding them.

He leaned down slowly, parting her lips as he blew air into her lungs. He pulled back as she gasped and coughed. Giving her a moment to catch her breath.

She would push away from him. Leave him. Take him back to Arkham. Do literally anything else than what she was doing.

She opened her eyes and grinned at him. Grinned. He felt a smile spread across his face. She would be okay. She would be more than okay. Harleen Quinzel was gone, and now Harley Quinn had come out to play.

* * *

"Do you think I'm insane Mistah J?" She asked him.

"Do you want to be?" He replied.

"Yes."


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors note:** Sorry for the dely on this chapter! Writers block hit me. The wait between this chapter and the next shouldn't be as long though hopefully. Thanks for the continued support of this story. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

* * *

Harley couldn't wipe the grin from her face as she walked down the hallway of Arkham Asylum. A spring in her step. No one commented, didn't notice, or simply didn't care, about her suddenly bleached hair. And she had applied enough make-up to hide her pale skin.

Her shift was ending shortly, and she could go home. But she had one more stop to make.

She swipped her card and opened the door, smiling at the Joker who was sitting across the table from her. She sat down and started to open the gift she had gotten him. "I got you something Mistah J."

Joker smiled as he leaned across the table toward her. "Doctor Quinzel. I live for these moments with you."

Harley smiled as she pulled out a stuffed kitten she had bought him just last night. "It's a kitty!" she said as she wiggled it a little. Joker grinned. "That's nice. That's very nice. But you know what I really want?"

Harley shook her head, the smile never leaving her face as she waited for him to tell her.

"A machine gun."

* * *

Joker's arm extended across the bed, searching for the warm body that was normally curled up on his chest. When he didn't find her, his eyes started to open.

Squinting in the sunlight from the window, he blinked the sleep from his eyes and looked around the room. Where was that girl? Oh. That's right. He swallowed his disappointment and remembered why she wasn't there.

It was a few weeks since the ACE Chemicals incident. And he and Harley had been inseparable from each other ever since. Well, since the other night. The probability of Joker getting thrown back into Arkham was high, so Harley had decided it would be in their best interests for her to keep her old job. At least for now.

And it had worked. She had been able to break him out just two days ago with no suspicions raised.

Joker sat up slowly and looked around the room that had become theirs. Knives and guns were laying in haphazard piles, and Harley's wide array of costumes and outfits mingled with his on the floor.

He smiled a little, something he had been doing more and more since Harley had joined him, and stood up.

He made his way over to the desk in the corner and picked up some of the blueprints they had been working on last night. The Batman had a little sidekick it seemed. A Robin. And that certainly wouldn't do. But that was a plan he would wait until later to think about.

Joker walked toward the door, stretching his arms above his head as he did so and cracking his back, suppressing a yawn. Harley was a breath of fresh air. A revitalization of his career. His queen of hearts.

He stumbled toward the kitchen, growling under his breath as he ran a hand through his hair, slicking it back. He did consider the possibility that he had become too attached to his Harley. That maybe she was more trouble than she was worth. But then he remembered the feeling of her lips on his. The warmth of her body. And those thoughts were pushed away.

He had never felt so strongly about someone before. Not even Batman. And he absolutely loved that menace.

He picked up a note that was laying under a gun on the counter. Clearly from Harley.

 _See ya later Mister J. -HQ_

He smiled a little and crumpled the note up, throwing it on the floor as he walked toward the window to look outside. It was well into the day, and Joker could thank his insomnia for that. Every once and awhile Harley would try and knock him out with a high dose of drugs. But he had developed quite a high tolerance to such things years ago and they never worked.

But last night had been the first half decent night of sleep he'd gotten in over three months.

He leaned against the glass, looking out across the city skyline. He loved this city. It was in his blood, almost literally. And he absolutely loved the anarchy. The chaos. And the sounds. The sound of people, sirens, gunshots, and screams. Yes. Gotham was his home.

Joker blinked a few times as he watched the cars driving on the street below him. His apartment was above his club. Which was located in the rougher half of Gotham. Well, rougher was a harsh word. Maybe more like where bigger criminals with higher motives tended to gather. The whole city was rough.

He licked his lips absently, noting the absence of his lipstick as he backed away from the window and prepared to get dressed. He preferred the darkness. Darkness meant Batman. And Batman was just so much fun. But recently the sun had grown on him. After all, the sun meant watching as the rays danced across Harley's skin in the morning, Illuminating her hair almost like a halo. Yes. The sun wasn't so bad.

Though try as he might, the sun reminded him of another woman. And a child that had never been born.

"Boss."

Jokers thoughts were mercifully cut off by a henchman who walked into the room. Joker turned around, glaring at him. "What?" he asked. Growling softly.

"Its Harley," The man started. But Joker was already walking toward him, his heart skipping a few beats. "What?" he asked again. But this time there was a panic in his tone.

"She's in the hospital."

* * *

 **Beep... Beep... Beep...**

Harley groaned as she shifted in bed, trying to blink her eyes open. They felt heavy and didn't respond. That paniced her, and the ever steady beeping that had woken her up in the first place started to beep faster.

She couldn't figure out where she was. The last thing she remembered was walking toward home and then... Someone had grabbed her? Her mind was too fuzzy to focus and her panic only grew.

The unmistakable feeling of a hand touching hers made her freeze, her panic doubling. Were they going to kill her? Torture her?

"Harley baby breath." The words were spoken in a rush, but the person saying them was unmistakable to her. "Puddin?" she asked, forcing the words past her lips as her eyes finally started to open. Yes, it was indeed her Mistah J. Though he currently looked nothing like the clown prince of crime.

He was wearing jeans, skinny jeans, (her skinny jeans?) and a Batman t-shirt. A hoodie accompanying the ensemble that effectively hid his tattoos. His hair was covered by a grey beanie. And his make-up was gone, which startled her, but she quickly grew used to it. Yes, it was her puddin. But that didnt explain what was going on.

"What's goin' on?" She asked, worry in her eyes.

He smiled with... Was that relief? It couldn't have been. And sat down on the edge of the bed, his thumb rubbing against her knuckles. "You're in a hospital Harl. Someone left you all bloody in an alleyway."

Harley frowned. Not remembering any of what he was saying. "I can't remember..." She said, shaking her head.

"They got you on all kinds of drugs." He explained. And Harley looked around, now noticing an IV hooked up to her arm. "Which I may have stolen some of. And I can barely remember my own name." he added, which made Harley giggle. "You can never remember your own name." she pointed out. And Joker grinned, a familiar grin they calmed all of Harley's fears. "Oh that's right. I forgot."

Harley smiled at him, swallowing a lump in her throat as Joker leaned forward and pressed his forehead to hers, closing his eyes. "My one, my only, my infamous Harley Quinn. Who did this to you?"

Harley knew he didn't expect an answer, so she just closed her eyes. Feeling sleep pull her away.

* * *

Joker watched her sleeping sometimes when his insomnia acted up. And tonight was one of those nights. He watched as her back rose and fell to the sound of her breathing. In some ways it calmed him. In some ways it angered him.

He rolled over to his other side, watching the minutes tick by on the clock. Watching as one turned to two. And two turned to three. And so on. Eventually he resigned himself to the fact that he wasn't going to be getting sleep tonight.

He glanced at Harley as he sat up, hoping not to wake her as he walked across the carpet toward the door.

It had been a few days since Harley was cleared from the hospital, and Joker had yet to get the information he needed out from her. Who had hurt her?

She still had bruises on her arms, which wasn't an unusual sight. Joker often gave her a few decent bruises during his escapes. But this was different. This was Harley hurt by some low-life who didn't even bother to stick around.

He was confident that whoever it was didn't know about her connection to him. Which was good. But it left him wondering who Harley, or rather Harleen, had angered to incur such wrath.

He walked out of the room, his bare feet making no noise as he walked across the plush white carpet. He'd tasked some of his goons to look into the incident with Harley, but so far they'd had no luck. Which frustrated him to no end.

He ran a hand through his hair, absently noting that it had started to grow longer down his neck, and again stood by the window, looking outside at Gotham. That infernal Batsymbol was in the sky again. His upper lip raised as he growled under his breath.

Batman was at it again. Ruining someone's fun.

Any other night, Joker would go out and join the fun as well. But not tonight. He wanted to stay with Harley tonight.

"Puddin?" Her soft, hesitant, and still sleepy voice pulled him from his thoughts as he turned to look back at her. She was wearing an old nightgown, and her blonde hair was a mess of curls, but she was no less beautiful to him.

She watched him from their bedroom door with a small smile on her face. Her arms self consciously covering the dark purple bruises on her exposed skin. "Come back to bed." she told him.

Joker smiled a little as he closed the distance between the two of them. "In a minute." he promised as his fingers pulled hers away from her arms so he could get a better look at the damage that had been done to her. He had seen his fair share of bruises. On himself, on her, on others. But these were different. These weren't done by fists. These were done by other means. And suddenly he knew who did this.

* * *

Harley knew something was up. Something was different tonight. Sure the club was just as packed as it always was. And sure her puddin was acting just as moody as he normally would. But something was definitely up. If only she could figure out what.

A cheer went out from the crowd as Harley stepped into one of the cages hanging from the ceiling. Her years of gymnastics coming in handy as she climbed effortlessly through the bars. Performing a sort of dance to the dubstep blaring from the speakers.

She caught the Jokers eyes a few times, never holding them though. They had both agreed that for now no one needed to know that they were an item. The dangers outweighed the rewards.

She eventually found herself hanging upside down. And that's when she finally figured out what was different.

A rather buff man with several tattoos had joined the Joker in his private beaded off section of the club. And rather then wondering who her puddin was making a deal with now, she knew him. She knew him quite well actually. He was her former boyfriend. And he was the man that had grabbed her in the alleyway.

She had remembered what had happened a few hours after the drugs had worn off. But she had been reluctant to tell her puddin what had happened for just this reason.

She was still hanging upside down when he looked over at her, beckoning her over with a wiggle of his fingers. Harley climbed down and immediately made her way through the crowd toward them. If he was going to insist on being stupid, then so would she.

She giggled madly as she parted the beads and sat on the edge of the couch, giggling at Joker. "Hey Mistah J." She said, licking her teeth with her tongue as she continued to grin. Ignoring the man sitting across from her.

"Harley," Joker started, a fake smile on his face as he reached a hand out to her. And Harley could tell he was putting on a grand show. "I was just talking to my new friend here," He continued, indicating her former boyfriend with his other hand. "And I was thinking of giving you to him as a gift."

Harley concealed her surpise with a giggle. Where was he going with this?

"He likes to beat people up with a bat." Joker continued. And Harley glanced up at him with a pained expression as the Jokers hand clenched a little too tightly around her arm. "Doesn't that sound like fun?"

"Sure Mistah J." She said with a giggle.

"And guess what?" He asked, still faking a smile as he looked down at Harley. "He works at Arkham. Won't that be exciting?"

"If ya say so Mistah J." She said, giggling again.

Her former boyfriend, Wade, stiffened a little. Clearly starting to get nervous as Joker pushed Harley toward him. Harley didn't hesitate to sit on the man's lap. Acting blonde and doey eyed as she giggled at him, her nails tracing his jawline. "Hiya mister." She said, grinning at him. But there was clear worry in her eyes. What was the Joker doing?

"What's the matter? Don't want me?" Harley asked after he didn't speak. Starting to pout. Joker made a tsking sound from behind her. "Don't you like my gift? Isn't she beautiful enough for you?" He asked, starting to sound angrier.

"Yeah- I mean no." Wade said, starting to push Harley off of him as he clearly realised what was going on. "This is your lady, Joker. Right? I don't want no beef."

Harley sat down next to him on the couch and looked up at Joker who had suddenly gotten more serious than she had ever seen him.

"You don't want no beef?" Joker repeated, mocking him. "You don't want no beef?" He asked again as he pulled his gun out and aimed it at the man's head. "Then don't touch my girl."

Harley screamed and covered her eyes as the gun went off, curling into herself a little.

The only sound in the room was the heavy breathing of the Joker, but he must have sent the rest of the club a glare because the music and sounds of people quickly started back up again.

Harley only looked up as she felt his gentle hands on her shoulders. "He'll never touch you again Harl." He told her as he lifted her chin to meet her eyes. But Harley pulled away, purposely not looking over at what had to be a bloody mess next to her, and stood up. "That wasn't your choice to make." She told him. More serious than she had been in weeks.

Before allowing him the chance to speak, she walked away.

* * *

Given the chance to do it over, Joker would have done the same thing. No one touched his Harley and got away with it. But he did regret that his actions seemed to make her angry at him.

He hadn't seen her in two weeks. And he was starting to get frantic.

Their apartment was both a mess, and meticulously organised. The once grand piano in the corner was broken behind repair, and the wallpaper had been frantically peeled from the walls. The once white carpets were stained by his blood, and the walls had bullet holes in them. He sat in the middle of an array of weapons he had spread around in a perfect circle. Laughing as he held one of his guns in his right hand.

Laughing was always better than breaking down. But he couldn't laugh forever.

"Boss?" The hesitant voice of one of his thugs snapped him out of it and he sat up slowly.

"Where is she?" He growled softly. Glaring at the man.

But the man didn't get to answer as Harley stepped past him in the room. Joker was suddenly keenly aware of his own surroundings. And how insane he must look.

He barely noticed the man leaving as Harley stepped closer, kneeling in front of him. "Puddin..." she started hesitantly. Reaching for his face. But Joker didn't let her finish. Crashing his lips against hers hungerly.

* * *

Later that night Harley lay with her head on the Jokers chest. Her fingers tracing the tattoos across his stomach. "Puddin?" she asked as she looked up toward him.

"Hm?" He responded, not looking toward her as his gaze remained toward the ceiling.

"I'm not mad you killed Wade." She told him. And that brought his attention down toward her. "Oh?"

"I'm mad you didn't let me do it." She said. A new darker tone to her voice.

She expected him to be surprised. But maybe she shouldn't have. It was the Joker after all. He wasn't surprised. He was elated.

His lips parted into a smile, and he laughed.

Harley joined him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Authors Note:** So sorry _again_ for the wait! Life got incredibly crazy and I had no time to write. This is a shorter chapter, but it sets up what's to come in the next chapter so think of it as chapter 5 and a half. We'll be briefly going inside the head of a certain dark knight, and this chapter is unfortunately light on Harley/Joker interaction, but I promise next chapter will have more. Hope you enjoy!

* * *

Joker slipped his arms into the sleeves of his favorite tuxedo, admiring his silhouette in the mirror as he turned to each side in turn. He clasped the button at his abdomin, then unclasped it. Trying to decide which looked better. He eventually clasped it for good. Harley sometimes liked to play with the buttons on his shirts and this was, after all, a date night of sorts.

Satisfied with his suit, he moved on to his face. Instead of applying his signature lipstick, he covered his face with a coat of foundation, making his skin have a more fleshy tone and ensuring he wouldn't stand out in a crowd. He made sure his green hair was neatly tucked into a black top hat and out of sight as he smiled. Unless they knew him, no one would be any the wiser to his true identity.

Joker pulled on white gloves to hide the tattoos that adorned his fingers, and grabbed his cane. Admiring himself once more, he turned and left the room. He had a few things to prepare for before the 'date', and he better get started. Harley was usually punctual.

There was a party at the Wayne estate tonight. And parties were made to be crashed.

* * *

Bruce Wayne pinched the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes. It had been a long night, and he had not been looking forward to the party he was hosting. He couldn't get out of it though, no matter how much he had bargained with Alfred.

He snagged a drink from a passing waiter and downed it in one gulp. It was going to be a long night.

He'd lost count of the number of people that he had shaken the hands of, and made small talk with, when he spotted them. At first glance, they seemed like any other party goer. But Bruce knew the man. Would know him anywhere. Sure, he didn't look like the Joker right now. But the way he carried himself. That smile. It was him. No doubt about it. But what was he doing here?

A blonde woman was giggling and clinging to the Jokers suit collar. Clearly a little tipsy. But Bruce couldn't place her face. And Joker seemed... Happy. Genuinely happy. And... In love? No. There was no way. But Bruce couldn't ignore the way that he looked at the girl. With such... Care. He brushed the thoughts from his head and looked around for Alfred.

* * *

Joker considered the night a success. Harley was enjoying herself beyond reason, and looked absolutely gorgeous to boot in a form fitting green dress, twenty buttons and a strap. And Joker was enjoying fooling around with his Harley.

"Having fun?" He whispered in Harleys ear as they glided across the dance floor. Harley smiled in response. And Joker could see the joy in her eyes. It both scared him, and... He stopped that train of thought as he spotted the master of the house, Bruce Wayne, walking through the crowd. He was hard to miss. Standing several inches taller then the other people here. And he was as handsome as the tabloids said he was. Not that Joker read those of course.

But something else was drawing his attention. Something about this Mr. Wayne guy seemed familiar... Oh well. He returned his focus to the woman that he, for all intents and purposes, had stolen the heart of.

She smiled up at him, and he smiled back. A practiced smile. A non-committal smile. It wasn't that he was trying to fool her, but he was starting to regret his present course of action. He'd become... soft. The Joker had started to fade away and he was starting to be something else. And that simply wouldn't do.

Joker pushed the thoughts from his mind for now as he spin Harley around. Admiring her choice of attire. Deep dark velvet hugged her silhouette, and her soft blonde hair was curled delicately around her shoulders. She wore matching heels, some black stockings, and a smile. He was aware that people had started to stare at them, but he didn't mind being the center of attention.

But now back to the real reason he was here. Joker swayed in time to the music with Harley in his arms as he looked around the room for a certain... Ah. There he was. Jason Todd. Joker had followed the young man home a few days ago. Or should he say he followed Robin home a few days ago. He wondered if dear old Brucie knew what his ward did at night. The sidekick of Batman was nothing to scoff at. It was a wonder Bruce hadn't caught him sneaking out yet.

Joker leaned down a little to whisper in Harley's ear. "Be a doll and get me a drink?" he asked her, or rather ordered her. She looked up at him with confusion, but nodded. "Alright Puddin." she said as she pulled away from him and walked through the crowd. Joker didn't take his eyes off of Jason as he moved in the opposite direction of Harley through the crowd. He had almost reached the little brat when a strong hand gripped his arm. Joker froze and turned around, following the arm up to the owner. Bruce Wayne.

The man was smiling as Joker frowned at him. "I don't think I caught your name, Mr..." Bruce prompted as Joker continued to frown at him. "Ker." Joker finally responded. "Mr. Joe Ker."

"Funny." Bruce said, pulling his hand back from his shoulder. "I know I guy with a similar name." Joker looked at him, a sudden realisation hitting him as his frown spread into a wide grin. "Oh?" Joker asked, leaning on his cane. "Maybe you should be careful where you spend your nights, Mister Wayne."

He watched as Bruce stiffened, then force a smile. "I'll see you around, I'm sure." He said as he started to walk away.

"I'm sure." Joker repeated as he watched him walking. Taking a shameless moment to admire the view. Checkmate, Batsy.

"Puddin?" Harley asked as she walked up to Joker, a glass of champaign in her hand that she held out to him. "Come along Harley." Joker said as he took the drink from her and dumped it into a nearby potted plant. He grabbed her hand and started to lead her to the doorway. "We have new plans to make."


End file.
